It seemed like a normal day at the office doing paperwork until Scully checked her mail and found something surprising.
"Mulder."
"Yes?"
"I do not want to be your friend on Facebook."
"C'mon, Scully, I thought we were friends. I thought we were, you know, legitimate friends."
"Mulder."
"What?"
"If we are friends on Facebook, my mother will want to friend you on Facebook."
"So? I like your mother. And that's a good idea, anyway. We're friends too."
"You are not friends with my mother! My mother doesn't know how to use the internet! She spends all her time posting comments about Bill and Tara's baby to the wrong profile!"
"So I could teach her."
"Oh God. Bill. See, and then you and Bill will get into arguments about politics."
"Why would we do that?"
"Mulder. Bill hates you. Bill is a Republican. You are not a Republican. He will post something about innocent fetuses who deserve life and you will bait him."
"No I won't."
"What made you wait so long to get a Facebook profile, anyway?"
"I thought the government was spying on us through them."
"Well, aren't they?"
"I've concluded that it's mostly the Zuck-man. Mark Zuckerberg. And I don't care if some pimple-faced kid knows my whereabouts. Besides, the Lone Gunmen joined last week. They claim to have found a way to booby-trap their information so it can't be deleted, viewed or downloaded without their knowledge."
"Mulder, do you really think that's possible?"
"No. I'm pretty sure that Frohike just wanted to hit on his old high school girlfriend. Sometimes the need to get in their pants outweighs the millstone of sensible security measures."
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Drabble-ish (not exactly 100 words)
Date: 2011-04-28 10:39 pm (UTC)"Mulder."
"Yes?"
"I do not want to be your friend on Facebook."
"C'mon, Scully, I thought we were friends. I thought we were, you know, legitimate friends."
"Mulder."
"What?"
"If we are friends on Facebook, my mother will want to friend you on Facebook."
"So? I like your mother. And that's a good idea, anyway. We're friends too."
"You are not friends with my mother! My mother doesn't know how to use the internet! She spends all her time posting comments about Bill and Tara's baby to the wrong profile!"
"So I could teach her."
"Oh God. Bill. See, and then you and Bill will get into arguments about politics."
"Why would we do that?"
"Mulder. Bill hates you. Bill is a Republican. You are not a Republican. He will post something about innocent fetuses who deserve life and you will bait him."
"No I won't."
"What made you wait so long to get a Facebook profile, anyway?"
"I thought the government was spying on us through them."
"Well, aren't they?"
"I've concluded that it's mostly the Zuck-man. Mark Zuckerberg. And I don't care if some pimple-faced kid knows my whereabouts. Besides, the Lone Gunmen joined last week. They claim to have found a way to booby-trap their information so it can't be deleted, viewed or downloaded without their knowledge."
"Mulder, do you really think that's possible?"
"No. I'm pretty sure that Frohike just wanted to hit on his old high school girlfriend. Sometimes the need to get in their pants outweighs the millstone of sensible security measures."
And what, after all, was there to say to that?